Your Relationship Issues Solved

Whatever relationship issues you are struggling with, there is a way to resolve them. You just need to work out what the best type of help for you is and go get it.

Here are your main options …

1. Solve it yourself
2. Get help from friends, family and forums (FFF's)
3. Get professional help

But which is most appropriate for you?

The type of relationship issues you are facing will determine what help is most suitable for you. Let's look at each of your options in turn.

Solve your relationship issues yourself

Sometimes it's just a case of getting the right bit of self help advice and applying it to recover a relationship. You can find a whole host of common answers to relationship issues on this site that may help you tackle the problems you're facing. I'll give you direct advice, recommend books, quiz you and tell you the truth.

However, you may realise that the issues you're facing aren't going to be solved by self help. This is often the case if you've attempted it before and failed, if you feel like you're running out of ways to deal with the issue or if you suspect the reasons for the issue may well run a lot deeper than they first appeared, either on your side or on your partner's side.

So what then?

Get help from friends, family and forums? (FFF's)

You know what? No – is the answer!

(I've nothing personal against your FFF's by the way ;-)

It may seem harsh or biased to rule it out straight away, but there are a number of reasons for doing this. I won't go into them in too much depth, but here are a few…

• Each of your friends will have their own different point of view – how will you know who's right?

• It's very difficult for them to be impartial – because they're so close to you they're much less likely to investigate ‘the other side' of the relationship.

• If they reinforce your point of view and if you're wrong it's only going to damage your relationship further.

• The number of points of view you'll get can leave you even more confused – if you get 3, 4 or more conflicting views, who do you believe?

• The truth is very difficult to tell you. Your friends are more likely to avoid telling you the truth than hurt you and potentially jeopardise your relationship.

I could go on – but I think you get the picture.

If you're thinking, “Well, he's a professional relationship counsellor. He would say that, wouldn't he?” The answer is, no.

If it really was a beneficial way of solving relationship issues, I would tell you. After all, I believe self help is valuable up to a point. And there are always more people in a month looking for my professional advice than I can deal with, so I have nothing to gain by trying to persuade you that professional help is the best way forward.

If you're looking for comfort, empathy and reassurance friends, family and even forums can provide that for you. If you want all of those things and the truth, clarity and your relationship issues resolved, then consider the option of professional relationship advice instead.

If you know for sure you can't afford professional relationship help, then go back to option 1 to find the answers and use your friends and family to comfort you in the hard times.

But whatever you do, if you do seek their advice or they provide it, take it with a pinch of salt. It's very difficult for them to be objective, to be an expert and to tell you the truth, so don't expect all they say to be good advice just because they're your friends. Sometimes it's genuinely very difficult to separate the two (good advice and good friends) in your head.

Professional relationship advice

If you are beating yourself about the head trying to resolve your relationship issues and the self help and the FFF's aren't helping, then start looking into relationship coaching. You can book a free consultation, a 1-off coaching session or start coaching weekly with one of our relationship coaches.

Obviously you can seek help from any professional. However, here I am biased! I recommend myself ;-)

But obviously, you need to make up your own mind about who is the most suitable relationship coach for you.

Whatever your relationship issues, there is a way to deal with them. Just make sure you choose the right way for you.

Couple in Crisis? - Save your relationship!

If you’re looking for relationship help that will actually help save your relationship, then you’re in the right place. Please enquire about our ½ day intensive couples therapy session here.

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